back

i wish to back to kampar, 
back to the life i used to be,
because i know everything there,
i have my friend there,
but i know i cant do so...
i must let myself to be stronger,
adapt to a new environment,
we cant back to the past, 
as life keep moving,
i have to look forward..
i wish to back to the time when im staying at old house,
a family sleep in a big room,
after bath we need to ask mummy what should we wear,
queer up and wait for the punish of the day,
asking mummy to get more soup for us,
cause we are not high enough..
always sit on daddy leg,
i am always at his right side,
while my sister will be at the left..
i remember the way he smile to us,
brother will buy us some snack after school,
and we keep all of that in a cupboard,
but finally all spoilt..
we are so young on that time,
but that is very far away from now,
i miss everything so much,
but i shouldn't wish to go back,
i need to learn to be a better girl,
i don't want them to worry and take care for me,
change the position, 
i want to own that ability to take care of them..