timing

the timetable i make for myself owez failed...
now rushing to complete all the subjects in short time,
so long didnt so hardworking,
so tired,
this semester i used too many time on exhibition,
now i need to play for my enjoy..
if nt i ll b fine for stay at kampar 3 more months,
god save me,
nvr let this happen,
i wanna leave here so much...
after saturday i ll totally relax,
but now i need to study more...
everything plz pass smoothly,
especially my result!!!

teenage

im a teenage,
18 years,
rock my uni life..
nvr sleep early,
singing alone at midnite..
nvr ever look back,
especially the bad memories..
delete all the rubbish in my lappy,
empty my recycle bin,
the rest is smile and happy,
im glad to own tht..
fall and learn,
smile and remember,
hurt and lesson,
sad and forget,
is like a pair of word,
owez come together,
then everything pass smoothly..
one more important pair,
MCD and starbuck,
it is a package,
for my UTAR uni life...
a great day again,
im enjoying every seconds..
i wanna record down every sweet scenes in my teen,
one day when i recall my teen,
i ll proud to say,
my teen is fabulous!!

better tomorrow

exam is coming soon, my life become so pack,

no more relax life style,

start to study, 

last minute again...

i dun wanna have semester 4,

everything different with last semester,

but something that haven change,

i will not let myself have semester 4...

i know that is quite hard,

but i ll try my best,

everything bac to the right path,

tomorrow and tomorrow,

everyday im getting better..

miss my home so much,

i wanna hug my parents and tell them,

they are the best people in the world..

growth in their care,

i know im the lucky one,

they are the sun in my life,

give me the energy to alive..

busy day

slept bout 5 AM yesterday,

wakup at 8 AM for course registration,

on my msn chat wif my babes,

prepare for registration war...

waiting for tht war,

a guy find me to apologize,

but i din 4gve him,

coz i think i dun need,

he post so many thing on fb,

say those suck thing,

then tell me he juz stand beside,

do nth for complaint,

n din mean to hurt me...

u mean to make me sad,

so u dun need to feel sorry,

u should proud tht u can make a girl cry,

like what u said,

u are'nt a guy or a man, u juz a boy...

dun u ask me what happen between us,

but should b what u 3 did in this few days..

i feel really funny,

after u did all tht with the JERK,

u wanna pull urself out,

dun u kidding wif me...

if u do treat me as friend,

communication prob should settle ourselves,

but nt by tutor,

thts how i did,

so i nvr complaint u all to tutor..

u dun wanna get hurt so u choose to hurt others,

tht great... 

u r living in secondary lifestyle,

open ur mouth waiting others to feed u,

raise ur hand when u feel gt bully,

wish u all the best for ur future life...

thx for u all complaint too,

i earn a lot from tht,

dun need to take tht risk wif u all,

is also a fortune 4 me...

i went for their drama presentation,

really "BRAVIA"...

congratz ya...

a happy day..

friends

this morn when i saw they go to complaint,

i do feel so disappointed,

i oledy feel tired for doing everything..

what i wish to ve is juz very simple thing,

complete a nice drama..

i try to talk to them,

try to ask for comment for everything,

but they juz assume im nth..

late, dun need to explain,

change sketch, dun need to discuss,

again n again,

i choose to quiet, 

burst up on sat..

even how fierce i scold,

my friends ask me to talk to tutor,

i choose to b patience,

i dun wanna complaint,

coz i assume them as my classmate,

i prefer we still can b friend after tht...

but my thought is really wrong,

i din, but what they did?

they say i din do sketch,

what i show to tutor before?

what i send to they all before?

who is the one tht find material?

who is the one tht talk non-stop to three wood?

but is ok la, assume tht is an experience...

dun u try to talk to a quiet guy,

he juz ll feel u r bullying him,

dun u wanna b kind-hearted,

wanna help them complete everything as fast as possible..

tht juz a ridiculous thought...

i knw what they told tutor,

but i wont go to explain anything,

i feel i can face myself,

i do try my best to do everything,

if they really feel so,

I CHOOSE TO USE THIS 20 MARKS TO EXCHANGE MY PRIDE

bout tht jerk, 

i juz can say,

congratz, 

he is the best lesson i ve...

boy, dun feel u really very powerful,

dun u thought tht u can do anything u 1,

the world is nt belong to u,

god is looking what u did,

u ll gt bac what u should 1day,

even nt from me,

u oso ll gt tht GIFT!!!

for my friend,

do thx a lot,

sorry for make u all involve...

thx edan for the afternoon,

i like every moment wif caramel macchiato,

n every joke he make,

he make me 4get the burden...

thx alvin n desmond,

i appreciate what u all did for me..

n tht key,

finally i gt bac..

thx veron, sze yee n fei tucq,

comfort me n company me,

u all make me feel im nt alone..

thx jia hui n ivy,

i found a lot of truth from u all,

i ll b strong,

no worry bout me,

he ll nvr make me down...

no tears anymore...

when i heard daddy sound,

i knw,

i should'nt cry for those nonsense,

i wont let them worry,

damn miss them..

GUY

totally fed up wif my group,

1st time so angry for group work,

i really look down on them,

how can guys do so?

if u r a guy,

ll u late for one or two hours

in every discussion,

let a girl wait like a stupid?

if u r, u r a jerk,

no gentleman ll let girl wait..

if u r a guy,

ll u juz let a girl do everything n ve no idea,

but last min u say u dun feel everything is ok?

if u r, u r a bitch,

u dunno how to respect a girl even urself..

if u r a guy,

ll u answer a girl when she is asking ques,

some more u did a mistake n she is asking excuse 4 ur mistake,

but u juz keep quiet...

if u r, u r a moron,

coz u dun even knw to respect ur parents..

sad 4 ur parents!!!they born u all wif mouth and brain!

god bless them..

i meet 3 guys,

they did all thing tht nt a guy should do,

mayb im wrong, 

they isnt consider as guy,

they are rubbish more...

change all the sketch last min on sat,

when i ask for any comment before,

they juz keep quiet n say ok...

but after tht they wanna change,

cz they nt dare to perform some part of my sketch,

is ok, juz b honest n say i ve no dare,

no big matter there..

fine, follow their wish,

change the sketch as they like...

then im waiting their call for rehersal,

time is flowing,

nobody wanna plan anything,

ok, i make a call to one of them,

ask them discuss n confirm wif me...

finally they say 8 o'clock,

ok, im home at 8 but nobody come,

8.30, wei hao reach,

continue to wait,

start to call but the others two jerk dunno to ans call..

ok, i go out to help my friend for sketch,

b4 tht i ask wei hao to ask them call me when they reach...

until 9.30 nobody call me,

i phone them,

nobody know to ans..

till i fed up,

wei hao ans n say they reach dy...

i rush home,

when i home i ask them y din ans my call,

yk say he put his hp as silent,

r u ok?!!!

do he really brainless, 

this suck reason he oso dare to say,

y dun he juz throw his hp into drain...

den he dunno to call me when he reach o wei hao din tell them,

i ve my ans for tht...

another 1, rs...

i ask him y he late,

he juz quiet like nth happen,

this type of guy oledy distinct,

ask him better stay in home wif his cartoon lover,

this world not suit him!!!

i ask them izit like this i can say i headache n ask u all home now?

they say ok...

thts great!!!

den juz out of my house,

wtf！！！

however do thx desmond n alvn a lot,

i feel better dy...

no worry, im fine,

they really spoilt guy's image,

luckily u all safe tht...

electric breakdown

i thought ther ll b electric breakdown,

so nervous for whole day,

wait tht moment until im tired,

so i went on bed.

im scaring for breakdown,

but i dunno what i scare,

im owez alone in room,

so should'nt b lonely,

im owez sleep in darkness,

so tht is'nt darkness,

i like to sleep with thick blanket,

is'nt becoz of hot too...

when i awake,

first thing tht pass through my mind is my lappy,

music still playing,

i scare my world will be silent...

i used to be alone at kampar,

i used to be alone in my room,

after i break with him,

i used to be alone in my house,

after jh transfer to taylor,

den i start to play song all the day,

they owez chat wif me,

i dun wan my world become silent...

luckily when hang out,

my friend still ll chat wif me nonstop,

if not i may bring along a travel speaker..

however electric din break down,

music ll continue playing until i step out my room..

compromise

feel that quite ridiculous but i choose not to argue,

so whatever they say i choose to compromise..

i din mean my idea owez is the best,

but sound out ur thought when discussion,

but not change the idea at last minute...

as a guy, dun try to push ur responsible,

i ll look down on u,

if u dun ve the brave to say,

at least u can type by msg,

really stupid..

if u dun ve that ability to do so,

den juz say sorry i cnt,

but not change everything in the last minute,

if u feel u r smarter,

then u can show me ur better sketch since the begining,

but everything is ok...

coz nowdays girl is different,

everything is changes,

i knw ther should ve some gentle girl,

so i ll did that part to some "special" type of guy...
 

thx to the only one,

he make me feel everything juz nth,

no point to quarrel wif nth..
thx to my honey,

ther do are a group of solo king,

miss the day group work wif u..

thx to ivy for chat wif me,

i do glad to found out so many surprise,

my babe..

learn to compromise,

i knw i can sustain in any way,

so no worry...

debate

i love debate very much,
same like before,
like the way everyone fight for everything,
but not sit quietly accept everything wif anger,
i hate this..
if u feel not satisfied,
u muz say out the reason and discuss,
if others have enuf reason for every did,
u muz accept it wif a open heart,
if u can't make it,
u muz tell and find the way,
if u feel that whatever,
den u can juz leave the group..
we muz know to bargain for ourselves,
but in the right way.


"i love u", is such a simple sentence,
can say to anyone any time,
then it will become nothing,
but if u do love,
u can say so...
if u din feel so den u wont tell..
i juz ll say it to the people i do really love,
the people that worth to hear this word..
so dun make me feel that u not worth,
stupid..

process

finally i can see some result for my drama preparetion,
dialogue oledy done,
planning for clothes,im so excited to make them dance..
3 diam diam guy gonna rock in the class,
can u imagine that?
wow...whatever, i ll make it interesting..
so sleepy dy,
finally i can jump into my bed's hug..
thx him a lot,
he make me smile again,
especially on the time i feel unhappy,
n that video,
i do rmb...

preparetion

finally my last mid term test past,

so tired, n i dunno to do at all..

is ok la,

prepare for future,

but nt sad for the past..

scold someone today,

felt so funny,

really wordless to them...

dun even wanna talk to him actually,

who he thought he is,

come on boy,

he juz nothing ok..

a gentleman nvr let a girl wait,

a educated man nvr b irresponsible,

a good guy nvr shout to a girl,

a smart guy ll nvr tell lie to others,

but is ok, a jerk ll do everything i said,

such as one of his ex tell me,

he juz a dirty moron,

stay away from us..

wish tht tonight i ll nt ve nightmare,

wish another he is safe now,

owez take good care on himself...

birthday

finally i heard his call..
talk to him and try to comfort him,
wish that he can recover very soon..
then start another party,
am i quite over,
ya, i think so..
but my friend's birthday today,
i dun wanna spoilt others' day,
change a clothes then went out..


same group of people,
a group of children,
the birthday boy, alvin,
wif edan, desmond, whity, veron and me...
left someone ther,
my sweety, jia hui..
she is owez in our heart wat..
we went to ipoh buy a cake for him,
chocolate indulgence,
wish that he ll like it,
we guess so coz he like chocolate very much...
went to the lake around 12,
sing for him and chit chat around,
now we r home,
around 3 oledy..
but i still haven feel tired,
maybe after step in the room,
i need to think a lot of problem..


no matter we cry o smile,
time will never stop for anyone,
if we cant change any fact,
y dun we face everything wif a smile...
no tears didn't mean tht i dun care,
but i choose another way to face everything,
im not believe fate,
but sometimes i have to and we must...
im not a weak girl,
everyday should b happy like birthday,
i dun wanna make people that care me to worry,
wish that same to everyone..


suddenly remind my birthday,
18th's birthday should b one of the most memorable day,
but i begin and end that day with tears..
so regret now,
this year i didnt make any wish,
i dun even ve time to  make any wish i think..
laugh on myself again..
the best present is my parents wishes,
followed by his late present, godiva chocolate,
a husky soft toys from my lovely friend,
and baskin robin wif my senior,
there still another special present,
a lesson from my ex-boyfriend, mr jerk...


thx daddy n mummy,
u r a candle,
bright my path in the darkness,
no matter what happen,
u all make me feel safe,
the most important people in my life time...
no more happy birthday,
but happy everyday to everyone..

valentine

im owez wondering how i wanna pass my valentine,
i knw valentine since im standard 6,
too young to ve a bf,
so is ok for me to have no valentine..
then i met him when form 1,
my puppy love,
he make me feel tht im his world,
he make a lot of things for me,
so many surprise,
my first bear on my table when birthday morning,
my first roses from him while valentine,
he give me all the best as he can...
i really feel touch,
but mayb im too young for tht,
he give me too much,
until i cant differentiate is that love or touch?
however we break up,
coz of some matter,
he ve been hurt me,
but he do changed for me,
anything n everything,
he juz ll say yes i do for any request...


after we break up,
i met a guy,
i feel i love him,
he say he did too,
but everything juz a lie..
my love is killing me indirectly,
until i lost myself,
changed everything for a guy is really a stupid deed,
i found tht after i awake...
when i look through the diary i wrote for him,
i really gonna slap myself,
how can i so stupid...
unacceptable..
it did happen and passed,
i leave and backed,
back to who i am,
but not who he wish i am...
 i do heard some story,
those excuse for his dirty deed,
i juz can say,
i ve been love a jerk...
we nvr celebrate valentine,
nvr celebrate birthday,
tht is my pleasure..


den i bac to him,
i knw tht we ll ve no future,
but i choose to back to his side,
he make me feel secure,
im so selfish,
i dun wan to hurt him,
but i did,
again n again,
when he ask me y i went bac,
n leave him again n again,
i dunno how to answer..
maybe im juz same like tht jerk,
too selfish n greedy...
sorry tht i leave again,
this ll b the last  time...
today is valentine,
the best and most cruel present i gve u,
i wont hurt u anymore,
leave ur world,
wish u all the best,
n plz take care urself...

complicated

i dunno can i still say i miss u..
but i did, n i text u,
feel tht i gt a bit over..
after class sitting in the pc lab,
i read ur blog..
i still can rmb every moments between us vividly,
im the one tht wish tht u ll nvr gt hurt,
but im the one tht hurt u too..
feel so sorry,
again n again i leave u behind...
if u really wish,
i ll dissapear from ur world,
bring along the pain i gve u...
i thought this is the best way for us,
we know tht we ve no future,
i dun wan to waste ur time,
so i set u free..
what can i do for u?
i dunno..
guess i should stay away from u..
by the way,
really thx a lot,
u r the best guy i ve ever met,
coz of some reason we break up,
but i appreciate every moment we own..
wish u ll happy owez
n all the best to u..

webcam wif an old friend yesterday,
i know he is worried bout me,
really thx a lot,
im fine, wish tht same to him..
dunno what happen to him,
he look like not in good situation,
but he din wish to tell me the reason...
i guess is study matter,
however,
dun give urself too big pressure..
u r a good guy,
god ll bless u,
everything ll b all right..
my friend...

before sleep chat wif jia hui,
she tell me a lot of jokes,
thx for tht,
but seriously,
im nt a kid anymore,
impossible to believe tht..
however im glad tht u try to make me happy,
it juz a dream,
n i do awake,
ther r tears n happy inside,
look at the mirror,
i ll laugh to myself,
n tell myself
girl, not to think too much..

everything become so complicated,
is time to withdraw myself from everything..

children

wif a lovely smile,
their life is full wif happy things,
so pure, like an angle,
a white cloth without any stain on them,
i used to be like them before,
but life didn't allow me to stay at that moments,
i have to face a lot of thing...
after fall down,
i ll be careful when walk,
watch through before i step forward..
after get sick,
i ll ve anti body to the virus,
so im getting stronger..
after get lie,
i ll differentiate everything well,
i cant trust others easily..
when time flows,
what i face in my life ll become more,
i wish to go back to that old days,
smile without burden,
believe without worried,
sleep without nightmare,
live without tears...
But, girl dun dream anymore,
i cant back to the past,
n i dunno how to lie myself..

once upon a time

i ve been call u dear,

hold ur hand at shopping complex,
in ur hug for movie,

i love tht feeling,

u make me feel relieve..

this morning when i wakup,

a lot of changes happen,

i dream a girl, my friend,

we seldom talk nearby,

i saw she stand in front of a shop,

den i ask she to go in with me,

we have lunch together but we din talk..

when i awake,

i heard my msn ring,

another friend find me,

he make my day more moody,

i dunno which one is real and which one is fake..

thought of u,

guess is same to u now..

i owez torture ur life,

again n again i hurt u,

sorry tht i choose to leave,

believe me,

u ll b more hurt if i din leave,

we still r friend..

phone my babe, jh,

talk to she,

she make me feel better,

thx a lot,

i miz u girl..

story

a boy love a girl so much,
it should be like the fairy tales,
they should fall in love to each others,
get married and live together forever..
but all of above is juz a tales...
he love u didn't mean u ll love him too,
love each other didn't mean u ll together,
together didn't mean u ll have future..
god like to make jokes with people,
love is not only matter between two people,
but two worlds are involve...
changed my relationship status in fb again,
twice in 3 months,
maybe others will feel im not serious in love,
but is ok,
i juz need to brief to myself..
sorry that i hurt u again n again,
u r the best guy i ve ever meet before,
but both of us know,
we will never be the last people in each our life...
thx for everything u did to me,
ur caring, ur concern, ur love,
u hold me up from the pain,
u company me every single moment i need,
u make me feel i ll nvr alone,
i oledy treat u as my family,
i dun wanna lose u,
so i choose to b like this...
i dun wanna waste your time anymore,
u deserve to have a better one standing beside u,
at least friendship will always long lasting between us..
i dun wanna leave any scar in our love memory,
there are no third people turn up,
there are no betray or misunderstanding,
for the last time, for my beloved,
i do love u..
like the dear dear,
ll owez company me,
it store ur love,
even we didn't together anymore..

dizzy friday

quite not enuf sleep this few days,
but this morning when i wakup i feel my battery is charged 75%,
should be enuf for today,
coz 2day schedule nt so pack,
i juz ve 2 classes..
went to class like usual,
everything went through smoothly,
start to used to the day without my babe...
but i do still miss she lo,
now i replace our noisy sound wif edan's ipod,
at least i wont feel tht the world become quiet...
after class went to ipoh,
look through a lot of purfume,
i want gucci envy so much,
its discontinue dy,
i ll own it soon..
i oso mark down few,
its really quite a number,
but juz put it behind,
i shouldnt be so greedy...
Yves Saint Laurent, CINEMA
Burberry, BRIT
GUCCI, RUSH
GUCCI, ENVY
is ok, one people dun need so many purfume,
so juz put it behind...
today starbuck again,
i dislike coffee,
but i do enjoy...
i forget its name,
sth like frappuccino blended beverage wif jelly...
den we shop for a while,
he bought a speaker for his ipod,
i so like make...
make me gt the feeling to have an ipod..
erm...juz after my ipad ba..
den we continue our day at MCD,
again, my diet plan spoilt...
i have GCB DOUBLE,
not only spoilt diet plan,
still active the weight gain plan...
sad leh, cnt like this anymore...
no more temptation,
this month no more faz food n supper...
home again,
glad tht i ve send my clothes to laundry,
n i juz done to wash my clothes,
so tired,
i guess i gonna meet wif zhou gong soon..
almost forget to note down this,
today parade ve photo studio exhibit,
feel wanna take an album when im young,
wanna memorize my 18..
izit better to memorize my 21???
i ll think bout it tonight before i sleep...
good nite to the world..xP

supper

before jia hui leave,
she tell edan not to let angie diet,
so edan owez try to spoilt my diet plan..
but luckily we juz go to ve some drinks,
ve some fish chips wif a cup of melon molly tea,
sit under air-corn,
but i feel warm,
coz i feel comfortable to chat wif him..
chat bout everything happen around us,
even we cant solve tht prob,
but at least ther r some1 we can share..
i heard that when we share our happiness with others,
we can double the happiness,
but when we share our sadness with others,
we can in half the sadness...
still left one people to hang out,
she nt only double happiness n in half our sadness,
she is a present,
gve us a lot of surprise...
a special friend,
tht nvr in love, but is the best love consultant...
hahax... miss her advice so much,
"dun worry, next one ll b better"
she owez say so..
she is a friend that i feel very worth to ve,
bout the others,
im quite sad n disappointed,
so i choose to let go..
if they know to appreciate,
then they ll understand..
if nt then we juz ll b each others' passerby in life,
i feel tired to meet up their request,
i ve my life,
i wanna do what i want, wear what i like,
thats my freedom...
if friendship is a bound,
then y we wanna make ourselves feel so hard...
friendship is not a compromise,
if u juz wish other to follow ur way,
live in the way u wish to,
then u r too selfish,
thts owner but not friendss..
however, wish them all the best too..

miss home..

sem 2 gonna end,
few weeks to go only..
suddenly miss home so much..
1st day i reached kampar and gonna start my life here,
feel quite nervous and hesitate,
at the same time im quite excited...
january, when the secondary graduate still enjoy their holiday,
i move to a strange town, kampar..
I brought along a lot of thing,
around 4 luggage and a lot bag of thing,
my shoes, my clothes, my dear dear,
my pillow and so on...
parents help me to check in to hostel,
clean my room,
set up everything..
night has reached,
finally we face the moment to parting,
i feel so helpless,
i dunno how to adapt my life without them,
i haven been to live alone..
when they r on car,
i dun ve the brave to say goodbye to them,
i dun wanna cry in front of them,
dun wanna make them worry..
i juz stand behind the door,
tears keep rolling down,
i wipe it again n again,
den i run back to my room..
alone, i come from my hometown,
i miss my home everyday at the begining,
miss the day play wif my puppies,
miss the day chat wif my parents like friend,
miss the day daddy cook for me,
miss the day mummy dance in front of me,
miss the day sister talk non-stop around me,
miss the day brother make me angry...
miss everything so much...
but day by day, i begin to put down,
sometime i even forget to phone them,
im such a bad gurl,
bz for my thing n enjoy my life...
finally, when i went through so many things,
problem in friendship,
problem in study,
problem in finance,
problem in loveship,
i found tht they nvr leave me,
i miss them so much..
n i ll nvr juz miss them when i need,
but is every moment,
they r in my heart,
so i nvr alone..
juz chat wif daddy,
my "dai lou",
he is my backbone,
thx for hold me up...

hill job

bz for a day...
totally a day,
sleep for few hours only,
but i still persist to blog..
i wanna noted down every memorable moment at kampar
before i leave this land...
organic chemistry is really very hard,
spend for a day to study,
wish to score good result,
so that final can pass every subject smoothly,
but seem hard..
its ok,
i muz work harder,
i dun wanna extend the time stay at kampar,
not because i dun like here,
i do enjoy my life here,
wif my friend,
but they gonna leave soon,
so i cant failed...
after they leave,
in this quiet land ll left nth for me...
after chemis exam,
went home n on9,
chat for a while wif jia hui,
wish she can adapt new life as soon as possible,
i knw she can la...
den went out again,
celebrate birthday wif my friend, cameron teh...
he is a whity,
wish him all the best in future life,
juz ve a little sad tht jh nt wif us..
is ok, we took a lot of photo to share wif she,,
i guess i should sleep now,
no panda eyes tomorrow..

1402

usually, early in the morning jia hui ll open angie room..
"angie, wakup dy, edan come soon,
we gonna late..."
then they ll prepared themselves at their own room,
after done, they ll gathered at 2nd floor living room,
wait for edan...
they ll chat n plan for their day,
what they dream yesterday,
what they need to do today,
which class they plan to enter,
who gonna presentation today,
where to go when recess,
what to eat tonight,
then they ll went to school together...
after class, they ll wait for each other,
recess together, home together..
they ll nvr directly bac to their own room,
they sit at the living room,
chat bout what they see to day,
what they went through today,
whatever they thought,
then they back to their room to clean up themselves again,
mostly they ll cook at home after bath...
sometime they ll invite some close friend,
edan, alvin, veron, desmond, ah teh...
come for dinner,
although tired,
they glad to see everyone enjoy..
sometime they ll go to the park near "beijing"
wif a big group of people,
they chat bout everything,
shared their problems,
find solution together and comfort each others...
sometime they ll jogging around westlake
then sit at the park near bus stop,
chat until late night...
thats their usual life,
more than 15 hours stick together,
they used to it,
n enjoy this lifestyle..

but now,
no more laugh n joke sound at living room,
no more jogging at midnite,
no more chatting at park,
so quiet, 1402
feel like empty..
i wanna move out here,
feel so sad to home alone...

phone jia hui in room,
we still chatting non-stop,
juz no more full with laugh n joke,
but full wif tears,
miss each others so much,
she miss everyone here too,
especially the life at here,
is same to me,
juz i prefer tht she is here wif us..
we need some time to adapt our new life,
no longer we ll chat happily again,
sem 2 gonna end,
followed by sem 3...
then we all ll meet up at KL,
continue our life,
hang out together..

道别

你会离开我很早就知道，
一直让自己做足心理准备，
我以为可以用微笑目送你离开，
抱歉我失败了，
有很多很多话想对你说，
那一刻除了泪水和抽涕，
我什么都说不出口，

原本是一个月，变成一个星期，
最后你说今天要走，
当我听到这个消息时，
心怔了怔，难过涌上心头，
才发现自己会那么不舍。
短短的七个月，
我们像家人一样过日子，
有了默契，有了很多共同点，
像两个孩子，无拘无束，
我们的生活没有泪水只剩欢笑。
很想念那些日子，
一起三更半夜跑步，
一起商量明天的服装，
一起上网逛街，
一起煮东西吃，
一起讨论问题，
一起开夜车读书，
一起考试不及格，
一起安慰其他人，
一起在上课谈天，
一起谈论未来。
还有和小澄，
一起说冷笑话，
一起下怡保，
一起去逛街，
一起去试衣，
一起去麦当劳，
一起去图书馆，
一起去吃冰，
一起吃蛋糕，
一起聊心事，
一起上网当“八公八婆”，
蜜蜂，蜜糖，甜心，
we all are so sweet..
接下来剩蜜糖和蜜蜂而已。

谢谢你，总是等我一起回家，
你让我觉得我的世界并不是一个人。
谢谢你，陪我走出阴霾，
我们一起火灾彩虹底下。
谢谢你，一直在鼓励我，
你让我觉得他不算什么。
谢谢你，陪我度过了这一段时间，
多难过至少还有人关心。
真的很谢谢你，我很珍惜我们的友情，
我很怀念一起度过的每一天。

我们有不同的梦想，
有不同的路要走，
离别只是时间的问题，
这个交叉点我们分开了，
但未来我们的生活还会再交叉，
很舍不得你，但我不挽留，
那是对你最好的祝福，
再一起生活时，我们会变得更好，
我不会再把房间弄乱，放心,
我会让自己顺利过关，准时去KL。
不用担心我一个人的生活，
我也可以很独立的，
过了今晚我们都不可以再掉泪.

原本这个星期的计划搞砸了，
但没关系，你会回来补回的，
我们要一起去唱K，
一起去看电影，
一起去逛街，
有空要回来，
我们都很想你。

naked

im writting this with a naked heart,
like a kid hugging a soft toy,
a pack of sugar beside me,
i love that feeling...
no secret here,
honestly i do love someone very much,
thats me,
i love myself,
love to make myself feel happy,
love to see myself smile,
love to let myself enjoy life,
love to do anything n everything for myself,
i love to love myself,
i ll love myself more than anything..
so i decide to gve myself some time,
relax by doing nth,
hang around in internet....
nearby wish to write blog more often,
i wanna rmb every single moment,
ther r only laugh n smile..

dinnersss

sunday gonna passed,
jia hui backed,
angie n edan so happy,
our spy backed dy...
she ll track our prey...
wow...
we play n chat happily tonight...
before she backed,
we ve dinner at little little cafe,
but the food really so sorry,
no more chances for it...
after she backed we hang out and saw our blueyy...
sit near to him,
enjoy our dinner...
den saw little T,
quite happy to c him..
lastly we go 4 "猪肠粉",
others say its very nice,
but, mayb our taste more special...

this is my nite,
wif 3 dinners.............
now my stummy pop out..

the voice within

Young girl, don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall
Young girl, it's all right
Your tears will dry, you'll soon be free to fly

When you're safe inside your room you tend to dream
Of a place where nothing's harder than it seems
No one ever wants or bothers to explain
Of the heartache life can bring and what it means

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend
Just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you will learn to begin
To trust the voice within

Young girl, don't hide
You'll never change if you just run away
Young girl, just hold tight
And soon you're gonna see your brighter day

Now in a world where innocence is quickly claimed
It's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid
No one reaches out a hand for you to hold
When you're lost outside look inside to your soul

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend
Just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you will learn to begin
To trust the voice within

Yeah...
Life is a journey
It can take you anywhere you choose to go
As long as you're learning
You'll find all you'll ever need to know

You'll make it
You'll make it
Just don't go forsaking yourself
No one can stop you
You know that I'm talking to you

When there's no one else
Look inside yourself
Like your oldest friend
Just trust the voice within
Then you'll find the strength
That will guide your way
If you will learn to begin
To trust the voice within

Young girl don't cry
I'll be right here when your world starts to fall

he do hurt me so much,
but i learn to become more n more strong,
i ll become better and better,
i wanna be the best,
i ll owez try my best...

he make me feel what i did for so long is juz like acting,
feel so sad when i found,
tears kept rolling,
but i stop them,
if u believe then we r friend,
if u dun den we arent,
no explanation,
unless u r my friend..

this song do make me feel better after so much thing happen at once...
thx edan for tonite,
company me and hear my story patiently,
comfort me n share with me,
i really so glad tht u r my friend..
thx a lot a lot...

thx jh for comfort me,
i knw u ll get orange num 4 us,
my sem 3 ll b more n more interesting,
dun worry bout me,
leave here with smile,
owez bring along the happy memories...

group discussion

juz end my group discussion,
with no result...
really feel wordless to them,
dun wan to start if group member nt full attend,
bcz they feel nt fair to them to do job 4 others,
if we muz count everything so clearly,
we should do personal drama,
den ll ve no conflict...
is ok, let them to discuss their part dialogue,
n i bz wif my stuff in room,
ask them to call me when done...
they used around half an hour to discuss hw to meet up in drama,
i juz need dialogue,
but............
totally break up,
one of them dun wanna gve me respond when i ask him,
feel he quite no manner,
but i can accept tht,
try to b a girl tht more generous than a guy,
wish he ll feel ashamed one day...xP
i juz wanna complete the sketch as faz as possible,
but i dun think they can cooperate well wif me...
no idea...sad nia...
to make myself happy,
starbuck now..XD

leaving

feel everyone are planning to leave here..
so fast, we just gather n know each other for 7 months only,
its so short,
but some of us gonna leave here..
i juz receive a text from jia hui,
she confirm will leave for her dream,
im happy for she,
finally she gt the permit from her parents...
im so glad,
she is such a kind girl,
she worry i ll lonely without a friend at hostel,
she wanna help me to find a housemate,
she worry i ll lonely at skol,
she owez ask me ll i ok after she leave...
no worry, i can handle myself very well..
sad that we can't owez meet,
glad that she ve the chance for her dream..
she is one of the special people in my life,
suddenly miss my old friendss so much,
miss phei and lynn.
they fulfil my secondary memory,
although now we din meet everyday,
but i do miss them so much too..
i gonna miss jia hui very much,
she is like my sister,
we spend so much time together everyday,
study together at utar,
cooking together at hostel,
singing together at living room,
chatting together at everywhere..
our friendship will not end here,
we all gonna meet up in future,
we ll become better and better..
however, i wish she all the best..

put down

after study for a day and sit for the stupid thermo test,
i put down all the burden,
enjoy my dinner,
hear some relax song,
(but my friend owez complain the song i hear is sad song,
not relax song..)
i dun want to think bout the sad thingssss anymore,
im sure that i ll fail for this test,
juz can hope that luck will owez by my side for final exam..
nearby im planning bout coming holiday,
planning wif jia hui wher to go,
but the sem break really too short for us,
mayb our plan will fail...
she gonna leave here,
she gonna go to the one academy,
i ll miss she so much,
my best friend, my housemate...
but is ok, i should wish she all the best,
go towards her dream path..
one by one...
we gonna leave UTAR,
we gonna leave kampar,
sometime i ll chat bout this topic wif my friend,
i guess we ll miss here so much,
miss the peaceful life at kampar,
miss the feeling of walk in UTAR,
miss the day jogging in midnite at westlake,
miss the nite we sit at bus stop or garden to chat,
miss the weekend few ppl hang out at ipoh,
we gonna miss here so much...
although kampar is a boring place,
we build our own memory..
compare to city life,
full of building and exhibition,
we live in another way at here,
i ll appreciate every single moment with my friend here..
times is flowing like water,
we ll leave for good..xP

miss

i do miss u so much today..
wish to see u every single moment...
wish to hear ur voice...
wish to feel ur care...
wish to talk to u...
wish to hold ur hand..
wish to movie with u...
wish to sing with u..
wish to hug with u..
wish to see ur smile..
wish to jog with u..
wish to dream with u..
wish to sit with u..
wish to tell u i miss u,
but i din..
i hate i love u so much boy...

歌词

考试后听了几首歌，
尝试忘记写什么，又尝试记起些什么。
在阅读室听着匿名的朋友，
想到现在的我和他是最熟悉的陌生人，
其实只是想勾起一些悲伤的回忆，
配合接下来的戏剧，
打算在剧情里掉眼泪。
遗憾的是，我竟然不能再为过去掉眼泪，
也是一种庆幸，
象征我比以前更好，更快乐。
结果听着看到最远的地方，
想起那些一直悉心呵护我的人，
尤其是爸爸妈妈和世泉。
从小到大让我觉得自己并不渺小，
告诉我
我值得拥有幸福，
我值得被爱，
那是你们给我最棒的礼物。
也很感谢他，
拭去我脸颊的泪滴，
教会我
微笑面对人生，
勇敢面对挫折，
一直对我不离不弃。
很抱歉，总是让你忍受我的坏脾气，
总是对你野蛮，无理取闹，
从来不说感谢，
因为我们心里都懂，
那种感觉比言语更真实。
你们是我生命里的奇观，
有你们在身边，
我可以看到最远的地方，
你们是我的巨人，把我捧在肩上。
终于感觉到眼泪的温度，
那是我的感动，谢谢你们。

schedule

sunday:
morning
- dry up my clothes
- clean my room
- throw rubbish
- done my reportsss
- study endocrine

afternoon
- keep clothes
- do sketch

night
- revision math wif friend
- revision endocrine
- prepared clothes

i must follow this schedule tomorrow,
no more mcd, baskin robbin, secret recipe...
hahahax....

大S

大 S 日記:不管再怎麼努力 還是有很多事情無法達成
就算搏命演出 票房也不見得理想
就算很想回家 飛機也不一定會飛
就算多明理 還是會碰到無賴
但我心裡的美好 是誰都動搖不了的.

看到那句话，想起很多事情，
像缺堤的洪水涌进脑海，
用一小时倒流一年的回忆。
生命中有很多遗憾，但我们必须学会假装忽略，
如果每件事都要耿耿于怀，
每天将是阴天，只有眼泪陪伴。
不管日子再怎么不如意，
都让自己客观面对。
不管曾经有多痛有多爱，
让自己清楚现在的位置，
看破那美丽的谎言。
不管回忆是好是坏，
让自己记住每滴泪水，
从中领悟那些教训。
不管今天站在我身边的是谁，
让自己准备失去，
没有谁会因为失去谁而活不下去，
只是生活习惯会改变，
善变是人的本质，
只是需要时间去适应。
习惯失去后，
回忆将云淡风轻，
画面渐渐模糊，
甚至会忘记一些片断，
天长地久，海枯石烂，
变成茶余闲聊。

一朵莲花，一种纯洁，
一场爱情，一场骗局，
一夜泪水，一种教训，
一个下午，一个故事，
一杯香茗，一句名言,
一抹微笑，一场人生。